Friday, November 20, 2009

Top Chef Recap (Plus Bonus Gourmet Recipe)

Eh, Hepcats, you already know wassup.
Not a great ep of "Top Chef" last night, but it did move us forward to the Final Four that everyone (apparently) saw coming: Red Ewok, Jennifer and the Douchebag Bros. I am officially renaming the Douchebag Bros. right now, because it is unfair to the older one, who is kinda cool.
Older One: Untitled Brother


Younger One: L'il Douchebag



ANYHOO
Poor Eli Baggins got the boot, but not before he revealed that he is BFF with AH fave Richard Blais and 2009 AH Officially Endorsed Top Chef Contestant Red Ewok. So Eli Baggins scored a few style points before his demise, maybe we'll root for him in a Top Chef All-Stars down the line. Not now, though, Baggins, pack your knives if you please.

So Red Ewok won, and Untitled Brother, Jennifer, and L'il Douchebag got to stick around. And apparently next week someone oversalts their dish. And we all know it's gonna be Jennifer.


Which is sad, because we like her.
AH Girlfriend Gail Simmons lost the armflowers this week, and showed a little cleavage, which was nice, but looks to be putting out the big guns next week, judging from the previews.


BONUS RECIPE FOR TIMMY'S TUNA NOODLES

I don't cook, but when I cook, I cook Timmy's Tuna Noodles.
  1. Take some noodles (uncooked).
  2. Take some tuna, and open it.
  3. Start cooking those noodles. 7 minutes in boiling water, please!
  4. Make that tuna. Use a big old forkful of Miracle Whip and mash up the tuna with it. Chunk Light Tuna in water is the preferred choice.
  5. Strain those noodles. Preferably in a strainer. (Called a colander in some states and Canada)
  6. Return noodles to pot, and put a shitload of Country Crock brand spread in there.
  7. Put tuna in pot, and mix all that shit up.
  8. Enjoy!
  9. Timmy's Tuna Noodles! patent pending

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